B5 limericks

[GKarsEye]

Let's create some limericks, folks.

There once was a Narn named G'Kar
Who came from a planet afar
They plucked out his eye
Into his soul he did spy
And it gave me a cool avatar

There once was some lingerie
Made in a virtual way
It looked good on Lochley
Who is a total hotty
Man, I'll never forget that day

There once was a Turner station
That broadcast across the nation
They ruined Crusade
Hope they don't get laid
And must resort to masturbation

There are now two fish in the sea
No others, just Londo and me
It's useless to try
In this elevator we'll die
Which is just fine with me


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"You do not make history. You can only hope to survive it."

[This message has been edited by GKarsEye (edited October 24, 2001).]

 

[Mondo Londo]

There once was a man -- Jeff Sinclair
Who was born to save folks everywhere
You know what's been said
He got a bone head
And went to the past, way back there

You all know that show named Crusade
That got cancelled despite our tirade
Just thirteen darn shows
But everyone knows
From our memories it will not fade

Ivanova just went away
We got Lochley, and most rued the day
But Byron was worse
With his song and verse
Though Bester did not have his way

Someday, there's a telepath war
With violence, bloodshed, and gore
JMS will not share
And that isn't fair
'Cause all of us want to know more!


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"What's up, Drakh?"

Michael Garibaldi

[This message has been edited by Mondo Londo (edited October 24, 2001).]

 

[FlarnChef]

*******
There once was a PSI Cop named Bester
Dislike for him always would fester
When his mind games unfurled
"It's an imperfect world"
Za'Ha dum went boom
thanks to Lyta's kind gesture

A Minbari named Delenn had no hair
When she did, everybody did stare
She became half human
On the White Star came zoom'n
To John's aid with a threat & a glare

There once was a captain called John
With DEAD wife he ventured & gone
Lorien gave him years
Delenn, love & tears
And with her, he later would spawn


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"...abso-FRAGGIN-lutely, damn it! I have been studying your use of lauguage since our last discussion. Do you approve?"

 

[GKarsEye]

These are great! Keep 'em coming

An actress plays Sarah Cantrell
She acts in Rangers well
Her names' Myriam Sirois
She looks good to moi
'Cause she is as hot as hell

The man in the middle is near
He's waiting for you, so beware
"Do you know who I am?"
Said the veiled Susan
But you know, "You have always been here."

There once was a dude named Bo
Who seemed a little slow
He met a hippie named Byron
Who sent him a-flyin'
How he did it he'll never know

There once was a babe named Susan
Her lovers she always was losin'
One was a dick
Another a chick
And the Ranger to heaven went cruisin'


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"You do not make history. You can only hope to survive it."

 

[FlarnChef]

There was once an aid named Lennier
With Delenn he was very sincere
He professed his love,
And his heart got a shove
Killing Sheridan became all to clear

The place is Babylon 5
A quarter million beings survive
All alone in the night
A beacon so bright
And reruns will keep it alive!

------------------
"...abso-FRAGGIN-lutely, damn it! I have been studying your use of lauguage since our last discussion. Do you approve?"

 

[Mondo Londo]

In year two, Delenn left her cocoon
Sheridan started dating her soon
Then the Shadow War came
Civil wars and great fame
Their alliance proved itself a boon

Galen is one clever dude
He worshipped the Taratimude
He found a great power
Learns more every hour
The Shadows, though, find him quite rude

Let's talk 'bout our great hero, John
At Za'ha'dum, we thought he was gone
But he came back again
With his pal, Lorien
So G'Kar started quoting G'Quon

Ivanova's nice to look at
But she treated Marcus like a brat
Yet during the strife
He gave her his life
She found out he was a cool cat

At 7, Monday through Thursday each night
There's a show that gives us great delight
It's comic, dramatic
We're all a fanatic
We all think B5's out of sight!

Londo and Morden made deals
Garibaldi cooked Italian meals
Franklin's stim use went wild
Talia had Susan beguiled
But we never know just what Kosh feels

When Lochley showed up on Crusade
A great big decision was made
And JMS showed his station
With showers in operation
So Gideon could go get laid

G'Kar started out a bad guy
He made Sinclair and Delenn often sigh
But he then got a vision
And then went on a mission
Where Cartagia had guards pluck his eye

Garibaldi loves his PPG
He shoots all the bad guys with glee
Bester messed with his brain
He recovered in pain
Then he married a rich broad, you see!

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"What's up, Drakh?"

Michael Garibaldi

[This message has been edited by Mondo Londo (edited October 26, 2001).]

 

[**DONOTDELETE**]

This one is from the B5 Parallel Universe story...

There once was a lady called Delenn
who'd lived in a temple since ten.
Then she met someone called John,
with whom she got on,
because she had a good taste in men.

---

The other two are from... well... more dubious sources.

They might look a bit strange in form (Shadow limericks have no rules) but here they are anyway.

There was a sleepy Shadow called Ziggy
who lived on the station B5
and shared a hobby with Kosh.
To confuse and annoy the young ones
in the Garden they would play energy golf.

There are factors that you should consider
when dating a lovely Satai.
They rarely like real wine,
never fight fair or give way
and can shatter planets with smiles.

[This message has been edited by Lennier (edited October 26, 2001).]