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Funniest B5 Quotes
- Thread starter Emfeeli
- Start date
I love Ivanova's lines...
For example ...
Ivanova is always right. I will listen to Ivanova. I will not ignore Ivanova's recommendations. Ivanova is God. And if this ever happens again, Ivanova will personally rip your lungs out.
The first time i heard this i laughed, and laughed , and laughed....
------------------
Life is like a piece of toast...
...Think about it
For example ...
Ivanova is always right. I will listen to Ivanova. I will not ignore Ivanova's recommendations. Ivanova is God. And if this ever happens again, Ivanova will personally rip your lungs out.
The first time i heard this i laughed, and laughed , and laughed....
------------------
Life is like a piece of toast...
...Think about it
Demonn
Regular
Corwin: Captain the Transport Association wants to know when your going to meet with them?
Sheridan: How much longer do we have until that probe detonates?
Corwin: Six hours
Sheridan: Ok, tell them we'll meet in Seven hours.That way if it blows it will save me from one more meeting.
Ivanova: Looking for the good in every situation a captian?
Sheridan: Absolutely, if I didn't I might end up like you.
Ivanova: Hey what's that soposed to mean. Did you hear that(to Corwin).
Corwin: No Commander(trying not to smile).
I was gonna post the elavator seen with Londo and Gkar but that's just too long.
------------------
A proud member of the Wind Swords.
"War Is Life And Death Is The Only True Peace"
Sheridan: How much longer do we have until that probe detonates?
Corwin: Six hours
Sheridan: Ok, tell them we'll meet in Seven hours.That way if it blows it will save me from one more meeting.
Ivanova: Looking for the good in every situation a captian?
Sheridan: Absolutely, if I didn't I might end up like you.
Ivanova: Hey what's that soposed to mean. Did you hear that(to Corwin).
Corwin: No Commander(trying not to smile).
I was gonna post the elavator seen with Londo and Gkar but that's just too long.
------------------
A proud member of the Wind Swords.
"War Is Life And Death Is The Only True Peace"
D
**DONOTDELETE**
Guest
Happened to rewatch "And the Rock Cried Out" yesterday...
...and I still rather brightly remember a certain conversation about human languages and carrying on cranky. Unfortunately it isn't half as funny in written form, so I somehow decided not to post it. Now, after coming to that conclusion, I wonder why I'm posting this at all? Quite strange.
------------------
"We are the universe, trying to figure itself out.
Unfortunately we as software lack any coherent documentation."
-- Delenn
[This message has been edited by Lennier (edited September 22, 2001).]
...and I still rather brightly remember a certain conversation about human languages and carrying on cranky. Unfortunately it isn't half as funny in written form, so I somehow decided not to post it. Now, after coming to that conclusion, I wonder why I'm posting this at all? Quite strange.
------------------
"We are the universe, trying to figure itself out.
Unfortunately we as software lack any coherent documentation."
-- Delenn
[This message has been edited by Lennier (edited September 22, 2001).]
*G'Kar sees Londo and a Human civilian standing and waiting for a lift tube. At first, he doesn't want to, but he decides to stand next to them and wait for the tube.*
Londo: Ambassador.
G'Kar: Ambassador.
*G'Kar pushes the button*
Londo: I have already pushed it.
G'Kar: I pushed it again.
Londo: Ahh. I hear there is a famine on your world's Southern Frontier. My condolences.
G'Kar: You should of thought of that before you stripped mined all our resources.
Londo: So it is all our fault, yes?
G'Kar: Precisely.
Londo: Though I have noticed that your own people continue to exploit your world's resources in order to build the MIGHTY NARN WAR MACHINE?!
G'Kar: We have to protect ourselves-
Londo: -By doing to yourselves has you say we did to you, ahh that's evolution for you.
G'Kar: Now see here!
Londo: Take the famine has a blessing, ambassador, a weeding out of the excess population.
G'Kar: One more comment like that Mollari, and you will become PART of the excess population!
Londo: Fah! Threats!
G'Kar: Yes, threats!
*At this point the Human Civillian standing between the two goes into the lift tube and closes the doors.*
Londo: Now you can go to Hell!
G'Kar: And you can kiss pouch you...you-
*Lift tube goes up.*
Londo and G'Kar in unison: Now look what you made me do!
------------------
"Ink on a page." -Refa describing the moral depths of a treaty.
Londo: Ambassador.
G'Kar: Ambassador.
*G'Kar pushes the button*
Londo: I have already pushed it.
G'Kar: I pushed it again.
Londo: Ahh. I hear there is a famine on your world's Southern Frontier. My condolences.
G'Kar: You should of thought of that before you stripped mined all our resources.
Londo: So it is all our fault, yes?
G'Kar: Precisely.
Londo: Though I have noticed that your own people continue to exploit your world's resources in order to build the MIGHTY NARN WAR MACHINE?!
G'Kar: We have to protect ourselves-
Londo: -By doing to yourselves has you say we did to you, ahh that's evolution for you.
G'Kar: Now see here!
Londo: Take the famine has a blessing, ambassador, a weeding out of the excess population.
G'Kar: One more comment like that Mollari, and you will become PART of the excess population!
Londo: Fah! Threats!
G'Kar: Yes, threats!
*At this point the Human Civillian standing between the two goes into the lift tube and closes the doors.*
Londo: Now you can go to Hell!
G'Kar: And you can kiss pouch you...you-
*Lift tube goes up.*
Londo and G'Kar in unison: Now look what you made me do!
------------------
"Ink on a page." -Refa describing the moral depths of a treaty.
hypatia
Regular
This isn't one of the funniest for most people, but I have had days where I think this to myself:
(Londo): "Fools to the left of me, Feeders to the right. *Sigh* It's time I found a REAL job."
Haven't we all had days like that?
------------------
"I do not believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense,
reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use."-- Galileo
(Londo): "Fools to the left of me, Feeders to the right. *Sigh* It's time I found a REAL job."
Haven't we all had days like that?
------------------
"I do not believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense,
reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use."-- Galileo
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, arial">quote:</font><HR> "Fools to the left of me, Feeders to the right. *Sigh* It's time I found a REAL job."
Haven't we all had days like that?
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
But, ALL of them?
------------------
Yes, I like cats too.
Shall we exchange Recipes?
Haven't we all had days like that?
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
But, ALL of them?
------------------
Yes, I like cats too.
Shall we exchange Recipes?
HockeyPlayer47
Regular
Hey Guys,
Keep them coming. This is one of the posts that I know I can look forward to here and all of the sudden everyone has stopped using it. I personally can't think of any others at this time. So you guys have to.
------------------
Ah, good old Psi-Corps. Ya know you guys never cease to amaze me. Just what do you do in your spare time anyway? Juggle babies over a fire pit? Woops... there goes another calculated risk!!!
-Ivonova
God I'm off! I couldn't be more off the f~(%!n' mark! -Bruce Boxleitner
Keep them coming. This is one of the posts that I know I can look forward to here and all of the sudden everyone has stopped using it. I personally can't think of any others at this time. So you guys have to.
------------------
Ah, good old Psi-Corps. Ya know you guys never cease to amaze me. Just what do you do in your spare time anyway? Juggle babies over a fire pit? Woops... there goes another calculated risk!!!
-Ivonova
God I'm off! I couldn't be more off the f~(%!n' mark! -Bruce Boxleitner
This one is from memory and i've seen the ep only once.
"I would like to live just long enough to see them stick your head on a pike to serve as a reminder to the next 10 generations that some favors come at to high of a price. I would look up at your ... (can't remember)... and wave like this. Do you think your associates can arrange this"
The best part is i saw the ep where he actually does this first then i saw this one. I was on the floor for about 10 minutes. Feel free to correct i'd like to see it.
------------------
"I would like to live just long enough to see them stick your head on a pike to serve as a reminder to the next 10 generations that some favors come at to high of a price. I would look up at your ... (can't remember)... and wave like this. Do you think your associates can arrange this"
The best part is i saw the ep where he actually does this first then i saw this one. I was on the floor for about 10 minutes. Feel free to correct i'd like to see it.
------------------
Lyta
Moderator
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by HockeyPlayer47:
Hey Guys,
Keep them coming. This is one of the posts that I know I can look forward to here and all of the sudden everyone has stopped using it. I personally can't think of any others at this time. So you guys have to.
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
Hmm, I am trying to get back in the swing of things after a long absence on the boards ... my summer was hell.
I have a whole slew of favorite B5 quotes but the ones that I thought were the funniest? The "cats" quote and the "moon-faced" ones rank up there in the top 5. Here are some other quotes in my collection that qualify as "funny":
Cannot run out of time. There is infinite time. You are finite. Zathras is finite. This ... is wrong tool.
--Zathras of Babylon 5
No one ever listen to Zathras. "Quite mad", they say. It is good that Zathras does not mind. He's even grown to like it. Oh yes.
--Zathras of Babylon 5
Zathras is always funny to me!
Finally, I recently added a new quote to my collection and even though it is not funny at all, I thought I would share ...
I think of my beautiful city in flames, Lennier. The streets where I walked. The temples, great crystal spirals, which sighed music whenever the wind touched. I think of it and I cry...
--Delenn of Babylon 5
It was one of the first things I thought of when I was watching the Twin Towers.
------------------
Monica Hübinette | http://monica.hubbe.net/ | http://abyss.hubbe.net/b5/
Find what excites you, and do it. Follow your joy; the rest will take care of itself.
--J. Michael Straczynski--
Hey Guys,
Keep them coming. This is one of the posts that I know I can look forward to here and all of the sudden everyone has stopped using it. I personally can't think of any others at this time. So you guys have to.
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
Hmm, I am trying to get back in the swing of things after a long absence on the boards ... my summer was hell.
I have a whole slew of favorite B5 quotes but the ones that I thought were the funniest? The "cats" quote and the "moon-faced" ones rank up there in the top 5. Here are some other quotes in my collection that qualify as "funny":
Cannot run out of time. There is infinite time. You are finite. Zathras is finite. This ... is wrong tool.
--Zathras of Babylon 5
No one ever listen to Zathras. "Quite mad", they say. It is good that Zathras does not mind. He's even grown to like it. Oh yes.
--Zathras of Babylon 5
Zathras is always funny to me!
Finally, I recently added a new quote to my collection and even though it is not funny at all, I thought I would share ...
I think of my beautiful city in flames, Lennier. The streets where I walked. The temples, great crystal spirals, which sighed music whenever the wind touched. I think of it and I cry...
--Delenn of Babylon 5
It was one of the first things I thought of when I was watching the Twin Towers.
------------------
Monica Hübinette | http://monica.hubbe.net/ | http://abyss.hubbe.net/b5/
Find what excites you, and do it. Follow your joy; the rest will take care of itself.
--J. Michael Straczynski--
I'm surprised no one did this one...
Londo: Hello? Can Anyone Hear Me??!!!!
G'Kar: I hear you. hehe
----
G'Kar: Not...many fishies...left in the sea.....not many fishies....just londo and Mee... *Laughs*
-----
Londo:
When I said my Quarters were cold,I did not mean "Oh, its a little chilly in here, I think I'll trow a blanket on the bed." no, I meant it was COLD! as in, "oh, my left arm has just fallen off and SHATTERED on the floor."
------------------
The man with his head stuck in the Blender
Shadow Ambassador to Wheel of Time
Webmaster of B5Blender
Londo: Hello? Can Anyone Hear Me??!!!!
G'Kar: I hear you. hehe
----
G'Kar: Not...many fishies...left in the sea.....not many fishies....just londo and Mee... *Laughs*
-----
Londo:
When I said my Quarters were cold,I did not mean "Oh, its a little chilly in here, I think I'll trow a blanket on the bed." no, I meant it was COLD! as in, "oh, my left arm has just fallen off and SHATTERED on the floor."
------------------
The man with his head stuck in the Blender
Shadow Ambassador to Wheel of Time
Webmaster of B5Blender
Shaal Mayan
Regular
Not many fishes in the sea not many just Londo and me
Rolls on floor laughing hilarious
------------------
Rolls on floor laughing hilarious
------------------
Demonn
Regular
Someone started a new thread on the same thing so I thought I'd keep this one alive.
Ivanova: Now captain if you continue in that manor the other pilots will only feel inadaquate.
Sheridan: Spoilsport
Ivanova: What was that Captain you're breaking up.
Sheridan: Nothing commander
------------------
A proud member of the Wind Swords.
"War Is Life And Death Is The Only True Peace"
Ivanova: Now captain if you continue in that manor the other pilots will only feel inadaquate.
Sheridan: Spoilsport
Ivanova: What was that Captain you're breaking up.
Sheridan: Nothing commander
------------------
A proud member of the Wind Swords.
"War Is Life And Death Is The Only True Peace"
Demonn
Regular
G'Kar is giving lessons to other Narns about the universe.
G'Kar: Put your face in the book.
*Narn hesitates*
G'Kar: The first thing we are all tough is that while outsiders can not be trusted we can always trust a fellow Narn. This is your point is it not.
*Narn nods his head, yes*
G'Kar: Than put your face in the book.
*Narn closes his eyes and places his head in the book* *Smack*
Ta'Lon: Theres lesson number one.
------------------
A proud member of the Wind Swords.
"War Is Life And Death Is The Only True Peace"
G'Kar: Put your face in the book.
*Narn hesitates*
G'Kar: The first thing we are all tough is that while outsiders can not be trusted we can always trust a fellow Narn. This is your point is it not.
*Narn nods his head, yes*
G'Kar: Than put your face in the book.
*Narn closes his eyes and places his head in the book* *Smack*
Ta'Lon: Theres lesson number one.
------------------
A proud member of the Wind Swords.
"War Is Life And Death Is The Only True Peace"
Lyta
Moderator
I just watched tonight's episode, Soul Mates and these quotes gave me a chuckle ...
Franklin: Stick it.
Londo: How odd. I didn't even know WE were married.
G'Kar: If I were married to Londo Mollari, I would be concerned.
Mariel: G'Kar, if you were married to Londo Mollari ... we'd ALL be concerned.
Ivanova: If you have any other problems, any other questions at all. Just ask.
Delenn: Well, now that you mention it ... do you have any idea why I am suddenly getting these ... odd cramps?
------------------
Monica Hübinette | http://monica.hubbe.net/ | http://abyss.hubbe.net/b5/
Our thoughts form the universe. They always matter. --G'Kar of Babylon 5
[This message has been edited by Lyta (edited October 11, 2001).]
Franklin: Stick it.
Londo: How odd. I didn't even know WE were married.
G'Kar: If I were married to Londo Mollari, I would be concerned.
Mariel: G'Kar, if you were married to Londo Mollari ... we'd ALL be concerned.
Ivanova: If you have any other problems, any other questions at all. Just ask.
Delenn: Well, now that you mention it ... do you have any idea why I am suddenly getting these ... odd cramps?
------------------
Monica Hübinette | http://monica.hubbe.net/ | http://abyss.hubbe.net/b5/
Our thoughts form the universe. They always matter. --G'Kar of Babylon 5
[This message has been edited by Lyta (edited October 11, 2001).]
AngelSummers
Beyond the rim
Excerpt from Londo's Hokey Pokey.
"you put your right had in,
you put yor right hand out,
you put your wholeself in,
and you shake it all about,
you do the hokey pokey,
you give a little shout?
That's what's it al about.
It doesn't mean anything. I've been studying these for the last hour. I swear to you, it doesn't mean A THING!!!!"
blody hell that made me laugh!!
Oh, and one of Kosh's old favourites:
"I've always been here".
------------------
May you all be well and happy, free from suffering, free from sickness.
"you put your right had in,
you put yor right hand out,
you put your wholeself in,
and you shake it all about,
you do the hokey pokey,
you give a little shout?
That's what's it al about.
It doesn't mean anything. I've been studying these for the last hour. I swear to you, it doesn't mean A THING!!!!"
Oh, and one of Kosh's old favourites:
"I've always been here".
------------------
May you all be well and happy, free from suffering, free from sickness.
